intomysaul.blogspot.com

Heavy is the rain in my heart...

2011-05-05T02:58:00.003+08:00

Yet another one.
This was inspired by a major crush I had back in college.
Ah.. memories

I fear that I have not been truthful to thee,
and it is eating away my soul,
For I am afraid that you may vanish
if the truth is revealed of how I feel
for you, for which I feel endlessly.

I gaze at thee secretly,
and I capture thy every smile.
My memories are filled with your sweet laughter,
that melts my heart and fills my soul with bliss,
and I guard it selfishly.

But I could not keep it still,
this enigma within me.
I risk losing the one that I really Love,
but I must be bold and face my fears.
This mystery I must unveil.

I have mention of a secret admiration,
so secret, that no one does know.
Thy once confronted me for the identity, but I lied.
The one I Love has always been thee,
This is, at last, my confession…

Rain, Plane, Maine, Train, David Blaine...

2011-05-04T21:53:00.017+08:00

I was in that phase again.. You know, THAT phase.
So, rather than waste time on sleep, I started doodling.

30 mins later, zzz...

Anyways, I manage to come up with this one. Hope you like it!

The Magnificent

Of all the faces that walks the earth,
I dream to walk eternally with you.
You are the sand beneath my toes,
You are my sky, the brightest blue.
The path you tread I worship,
Your footsteps I adore,
Your eyes, the clearest diamonds,
I can see into your core.
Your Soul, The Magnificent,
So pure, this child of earth.
Your angelic innocence’s,
Makes me yearn for your Love.

Had a strange dream after that, but that story is for another day... over beer

So, till next time my pretty people, Tich tor ang tesmur.

"It flows beneath the surface and soothes my aching bones as it cast a glimmer in the shadows, the sky burst forth and covered the dust at my feet..."

2011-02-17T00:05:00.006+08:00

Been thinking, lots of thinking. This and that. Strange things there is in me.

- Why IS it funny to see a friend get hurt?
- Does the taste for red and white wine differ, even if they are made from the same batch of grapes?
- Does hair ever decompose?
- Why do clouds have different shapes if they are made of the same material?
- Which came first the chicken or the egg?
- Isn't the chicken/egg thing a catch-22?
- If there is a little good in evil, can I trust a murderer?
- Some people will kill themselves out of love or have suicidal tendencies cause of breakups. Does that mean there is a limited number of heartbreaks that we can cope before we 'loose it'?
- Is it possible to pierce any part of the body?
- Can dreams be a clue to your future, hence deja vu?
- Why do we check our pockets whenever someone ask if we have a pen, even if we know beforehand that we don't?
- Why are we afraid to tell the person we have deep feelings for, how we actually feel?
- Why do we like to complicate things when they are simple enough?
- Why does everything explode in the movies, including a glass of water?
- How long can keep growing my hair?
- How long do I want to stay at my current job?

bla, bla, bla...

I'm running my brain cells out in a huff. Wonder if I'm gonna be a soulless hollow vege soon?

Rain today, gone tomorrow...

2011-02-15T22:58:00.007+08:00

It's been ages, A G E S since my last blog. 2 years stagnant. Well, that's just me being me. Don't even know why I bother to start a blog. mushberries.

Anyways, I got irked lately cause I'm hearing this rubbish about Valentine's day being a christian celebration and some, SOME religious group (you know, I know, capice?) are condemning it as such. I takes a lot to get me vexed so you know how far thing have gone to shit. This Valentine's-Day-condemning-issue is one part of a whole series of way-too-fantastic bullshit that the powers that be (read Gvt) are feeding to the normal everyday man. Quick quote 'An RTM programme last week, linked V's Day to Christianity and immoral activities. She said "immoral activities, partying and unmarried couples associating in private are traditions of the Christian community"!' What the mushberries??

Really? Are we going down the same path as other race/religion-strained country? Why does everything gotta involve race or religion here? Must we condemn our existence to this? I thought we're better than other countries with our peace and love thing going on. How far have we fallen into the dark well? Jeeze, don't seem to get this kinda problems back home below the wind. That's one of the only place in the world without this kind of problem. Well, maybe a little, but not enough to create a volatile situation. Maybe cause the beer is cheaper?

I know all of you readers would know that this poppycock of a statement is a load of bull, but now you know how the simpleton mind thinks. I don't blame the religion, I blame the individual. Think corny 'bad apples' idioms, but you know what I mean. So as a public service (or me just trying to fill empty spaces), please check this link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saint_Valentine

The interesting, and most important thing to look out for is this(to save time):

St. Valentine's Day

Historian Jack Oruch has made the case that the traditions associated with "Valentine's Day", documented in Geoffrey Chaucer's Parliament of Foules and set in the fictional context of an old tradition, had no such tradition before Chaucer.He argues that the speculative explanation of sentimental customs, posing as historical fact, had their origins among 18th-century antiquaries, notably Alban Butler, the author of Butler's Lives of Saints, and have been perpetuated even by respectable modern scholars. In the French 14th-century manuscript illumination from a Vies des Saints, Saint Valentine, bishop of Terni, oversees the construction of his basilica at Terni; there is no suggestion here yet that the bishop was a patron of lovers.

Now, the question rest on who St Valentine actually is? That I leave to your curiosity. Hey, nothing is free. Besides, learning is fun! Spread the knowledge people! And don't forget to spread the love too! Love is part of the whole that we need, and we need lots of it. Keep it flowing and glowing all you lovebugs of the earth. You are the hands that holds the universe together. Live and love freely cause no one can take that away from you.

So, until next time my glowworms, Tich tor ang tesmur.

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but the rain will always heal me...

2009-12-06T18:19:00.004+08:00

Ok, I haven't been keeping this shit up to date. So lets keep it brief...

- Working for a media company. Nocturnal shift. I love my job.
- Got promoted. Don't ask.
- Still living with mum. I don't like it. We're suppose to love them, not live with them.
- Got my tongue pierced.
- Was Best Man for Arthur's wedding. Got drunk, maybe engaged as well. Can't remember...
- Miss Sabah like crazy. It will always be home.
- My lil sister is joining the Supermodel and Manhunt Search, and got through the finals. Whoohoo!!!
- Still haven't got an xbox. :(
- Still single. -_-
- Got a haircut. Now I look like I'm 17 again... but bigger.
- Haven't gotten laid in 2 and half years, but I'm ok about it. (not really, but to hell with it)
- Still don't really have a fashion sense (for myself). Maybe its cause I'm still fat.
- Trying to stop smoking and become a vegetarian.
- I'm starting to get a taste for Hoegaarden beer.
- REALLY MISS BAMBANGAN!!!
- My laptop got stolen!!! FUCK!

That's about all that I could think of. I'm hoping to update more in future, but it doesn't help that I ain't got no laptop anymore. Oh, life is shit. Then again, its just a laptop...

By the way, I miss the starry night. There is way too much smog and shit up in the air. Covers the beauty of being awake at night. Nosferatu will not be pleased...

Like floodgates into my Soul, you fall from the sky, oh aqua of the Gods...

2009-08-22T05:09:00.002+08:00

Guess what I found out about?
Real eye opener.
I wonder how much money did we spent this time...

Nipah virus

Emergence Pteropus vampyrus (Malayan flying fox), one of the natural reservoirs of Nipah virusNipah virus was identified in 1999 when it caused an outbreak of neurological and respiratory disease on pig farms in peninsular Malaysia, resulting in 105 human deaths and the culling of one million pigs.[7] In Singapore, 11 cases including one death occurred in abattoir workers exposed to pigs imported from the affected Malaysian farms. The Nipah virus has been classified by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention as a Category C agent (http://www.bt.cdc.gov/agent/agentlist-category.asp).
The outbreak was originally mistaken for Japanese encephalitis (JE), however, physicians in the area noted that persons who had been vaccinated against JE were not protected, and the number of cases among adults was unusual [15] Despite the fact that these observations were recorded in the first month of the outbreak, the Ministry of Health failed to react accordingly and instead launched a nationwide campaign to educate people on the dangers of JE and its vector, Culex mosquitoes.
Symptoms of infection from the Malaysian outbreak were primarily encephalitic in humans and respiratory in pigs. Later outbreaks have caused respiratory illness in humans, increasing the likelihood of human-to-human transmission and indicating the existence of more dangerous strains of the virus.
Based on seroprevalence data and virus isolations, the primary reservoir for Nipah virus was identified as Pteropid fruit bats including Pteropus vampyrus (Malayan flying fox) and Pteropus hypomelanus (Island flying fox), both of which occur in Malaysia.
The transmission of Nipah virus from flying foxes to pigs is thought to be due to an increasing overlap between bat habitats and piggeries in peninsular Malaysia. At the index farm, fruit orchards were in close proximity to the piggery, allowing the spillage of urine, faeces and partially eaten fruit onto the pigs.[16] Retrospective studies demonstrate that viral spillover into pigs may have been occurring in Malaysia since 1996 without detection.[7] During 1998, viral spread was aided by the transfer of infected pigs to other farms where new outbreaks occurred.

Go figure...

'Make not morons of people, for they are the power that gives strength to the nation.' - SA

It drizzles like piss here!!!

2009-07-01T21:36:00.002+08:00

Hey to all,
I know...
I haven't been blogging lately.
Take a chill pill...
More later, when I find 'real' time to actually blog eh?
Gotta find a stable job first.
Wish me luck.

Better days to all.
Hugs to all me friends.
Shrugs to all me grrrs...

It rained like bricks and bolders, As the air got more and more colder, I jumped at every thunder... Why do I even bother?

2009-01-22T18:50:00.009+08:00

INTO THE BELLY OF THE BEAST

Yes, yes I know. What the hell am I talking about?

My mum works in the Ministry of Women Affair, which is situated on Bukit Perdana, and I had the opportunity to go there and look-see everything that goes on behind the scene in a cabinet ministry's office. Surprisingly, for a cabinet office, there wasn't that much cabinets around.

It was a Saturday, so there wasn't anyone around, except me and me menopausal mum. I imagine they're at home, counting their money(of corruptions). So, while mum was looking the other way, I sneaked my way around the place like a ninja. Ok, that's over exaggerating. I was moving more like a panda in a china shop, with my arms and legs bound together, all the while trying to balance an egg on my head.

Security was sponge cake. No cameras, no thumb print reader, no eye scanner. Skeletons it was.

Oh, I forgot to mention. This use to be the Prime Minister's office before they moved to their current location at Putrajaya. Dtk Dr Mahatir use to walk through these halls. That close to telling him what I think about politics in Malaysia. I was just like, what is it now, 10 years late? Oh bother...

We begin from the dining room. This room is situated right at the end of the hall way. This is where Mahatir used to have luncheons, that is, when he didn't have some lunch appointment elsewhere. I could've sworn there is blood stains of the virgins that they sacrifice for lunch right at the corner of the room. Either that or it's tomato soup...

Wide windows. Just in case the boss gotta jump out in case of fire or riot. Typical...

Another shot with the aperture turn up high. Was a cloudy day. Notice floors, polished to perfection. Chairs were in that position when I got there, I swear!!! It's the weekend!!! Everyone's on their leave!!!

Hallway. This view is from the dining room door. Forgot to turn down the aperture. Makes it look like a Mexican festival ain't it? Walls are littered with people of powers from the past and present.

Eh? What do we have here? Tetamu? What does the other door say?

Just as I thought!!! I bet this is where they keep the bodies of dead politicians in cryo-stasis. This I gotta Investigate!!!

Oh, It's only a restroom. Not too fancy though. Well, this is where those political assholes sit around and talk 'shit'. Nothing to see here. It did smell like roses though. This is normal. Politicians can 'sweet' talk all they want to the people. We all know that it's all 'crap' anyways.

This room, however did give me an impact. Only a few steps from the restrooms. This is the Conference room. Leather seats, really large expensive looking but cheap oak-like table, projection screen, walls of really important people... I felt the power resonating from the very walls itself.

Notice microphone. The Thursdays karaoke night really became a hit after office hours. They must really suck cause the mikes are all bent in the hilt. Will wonders never cease?

Yes, that's me. And yes, I'm sitting at the head of power. Just wanted to experience corruption, dictatorship and political moron-ism. I felt a twitch... Then i felt hungry. Come to think about it, I should have left my initials under the table and take a picture of it. Could lie and said I did, but that's just being loserish. Besides, I haven't got any proof. But the next time an opportunity arise, mark my words people, I'll be blogging from the ISA prison instead, and loving it!!!

Oh and if I do get imprisoned for this blog post, please send me care packages of lipton tea, Oreo cookies and homemade chocolate chip cookies.

Zeblug oust!

The Rain can't drain, The pain that stain, You're vain, I feign, Yes, I'm insane...

2009-01-15T02:50:00.012+08:00

KL...
ARGH!!!!!!
Enough Said...

Guys, good news and bad news... Good news is, I know where we are!!! Bad news is, we're in KL...

ARGH!!!!

Morning in front of Air Asia's Tune Whore House
Kiss my ass Tony F**k-nandes!!!

Public Transportation... ARGH!!!!

ARgh... Why, hello there cutie! ~_~

Lepak... ARGH!!!

Well, hello there cu... SNAKES??!! ARGH!!!

Midgets!!! ARGH!!!
Look Out!!! He's got a stool!!!

Hordes of Kamakazi Motorcrackheads!!! ARGH!!!

The sky... ahhhh... Peace....

And music!! Joooyie!!!

Em...

What's this picture doing here?

Choices!!! ARGH!!!!

Teh Tarik RM0.99!!! WOOHOO!!!

Packed and ready to get back to KK!!! (1st day)

Brightness!!! ARGH!!! MY EYES!!!

Ahhh..... That's better...

The Beatles Bar??? Penny Lane???
Where the HELL am I???

ARGh... Actually, this is cool. Thumbs up!!

Goodbye KL. May you not dwell in my thoughts for too long...

.....

2009-01-06T17:30:00.001+08:00

Hmm.... No rain huh?

Oh well....

No rain, no blog.
Amen.

Raindrops keep falling on my head.... Lalalalala!!!

2008-12-09T11:15:00.009+08:00

I checked my dad's name on Google today and I found a site that pays homage to his lordship. After reading what she wrote, I felt differently towards my pop. Seems like he can be a great guy (sometimes)...

Sorry, it's in bahasa. (my bahasa ain't that good. took me a while to read)

N.3 Pitas Rindukan PAUL TOM IMBAYAN!

Selepas penamaan calon untuk PRU 12, PKR memberikan kejutan apabila bekas pemimpin PBS iaitu YB Paul Tom Imbayan telah dicalonkan untuk PKR bagi DUN N.3 Pitas dan menentang calon baru BN iaitu Bolkiah Ismail menggantikan YB Datuk Masrani Parman.

Saya masih ingat lagi semasa YB Paul Tom menjadi wakil rakyat di Pitas, ketika itu saya masih kecil.

Memori lama mengimbau kenangan, sokongan masyarakat Pitas yang tidak berbelah bagi kepada beliau. Baktinya kepada rakyat daerah ini masih lagi dapat dirasakan sehingga ke hari ini apabila melihat beberapa bantuan rumah yang diberikannya. Bantuan asas yang diberikan kepada penduduk kampung dengan memberikan bekalan air dan elektrik merupakan pembelaan kepada golongan petani dan peladang di daerah terpencil ini.

Setelah 3 penggal berlalu dibawah pemerintahan BN, kebanyakan rakyat mendapat wang saguhati RM50 ketika mengundi dan ianya cuma berhenti di situ. Apa yang saya maksudkan di sini adalah sumbangan daripada Paul Tom merupakan sesuatu yang tidak bisa dilupakan begitu sahaja kerana sumbangan tersebut dapat dirasakan oleh setiap bangsa yang menduduki daerah ini.

Sejak beberapa hari ini, saya berjumpa dengan beberapa ahli lama PBS. Sengaja bersembang-sembang sambil tumpang sekaki memakan sireh. Bila saya tanyakan pendapat beberapa senior citizen di beberapa tempat sekitar daerah ini, mereka sungguh gembira apabila mendapat tahu Paul Tom akan berdiri untuk pihak pembangkang.

Senyuman di bibir mereka ibarat satu kerinduan kepada pemimpin ini. Mereka kata, orang-orang BN banyak menolong rakan-rakan dan saudara-mara sahaja. Dulu Paul Tom tolong semua orang tidak kira dari kaum Sungai, Rungus, Tombonuo, Kimaragang, Bajau , mahupun Suluk.

Saya tidak mengatakan ini adalah petanda bahawa Paul Tom akan menang mudah di Pitas tetapi pengundilah yang bisa membuat keputusan untuk memilih siapa pemimpin yang akan menjadi Wakil Rakyat mereka.

Kalau ditanya pada saya, mungkin saya berpihak kepada PKR kerana calon ini (YB Paul Tom Imbayan) yang telah memberikan sumbangan kepada ramai rakyat di daerah ini. Dengan itu, harapan kami sangat tinggi agar Paul Tom masih mempunyai jiwa seperti dulu.

Ubah Sebelum Parah, Ubah Demi Maruah!

-Lady Mariah (Anwar Ibrahim Club, Malaysia)

I seriously didn't know there is an Anwar Ibrahim Club...
Check her blog out at ---> http://ladymariah.wordpress.com/

This was what I wrote to her in return...

Hi, I am Paul Tom Imbayan’s son and I was Google-ing my dad’s name today and I found this site. Your kind words are greatly appreciated. Yes, I do believe that PBS should return as the leading party once more and from my sources tells me that this may be possible in future. I have spoken personally to my uncle Joseph Pairin, and though he didn’t give any comments, I believe that he, too, share our sentiments. I know and understand the displeasure and animosity towards the current reigning party for I feel the same way as well. I despise the way the people of Pitas is being treated. I have heard of the many things that has happened there during my father’s absence and I have to say it is absolutely unfair. The reigning party members(which I shall not name, but you know who they are) should step down from their seats and remove themselves from politics altogether. Power do corrupts a person and I have to say that they are absolutely drunk on it.

I have to admit that, even at age 27, I have not voted for anyone, ever. This is cause I feel that I haven’t met a politician that I can put my faith in or trust on, and on the unlikely event that there is no hope whatsoever for PBS, I may not vote for any future election. This is the choice I have made and though I am not trying to tell you to follow my footsteps, I plea to you to study, research, learn, judge and most importantly, Question the agenda of the politicians before voting cause the future is yours to mold, and not to be told to you. Remember, the people has more power that all the politician combined for the government could not function without the people. You have the right to question everything and protest against the governments’ choices. One man should never have this much power over the people.

I shall hope to hear from you and everyone else who has any questions regarding my father. I hope that someday Sabah will reign supreme again under the guidance of PBS. Also, if I have offended anyone, my apologies to you. I didn’t mean to offend, just to reveal the truth.

Yours truly,

Saul Alan Imbayan.

See, I can be a nice guy too...

(in a demented kinda way >:D)

The Rain did not came, It did not fell; To the Darkness I hide, Where my frozen heart dwell...

2008-11-30T04:59:00.013+08:00

Nope...
No rain today...

This is not one of my typical blog, that's for sure, but what the hell.
Everyone keep telling me that I can blog about anything.
Does it have to be about my life?
I mean, what the fork???
I think my personal life is pressure enough.
It's not for anyone's prying eyes.

I don't even know what I was thinking with some of my older posts.

Anyways, today, I want to pay tribute to the Rat Pack...

Dean Martin, Sammy Davis Jr., and Frank Sinatra
You Kings of Swings, Princes of Melodies, Lords of Jazz and Razzmatazz will always be remembered as three of the greatest musicians that ever lived.
The younger generations today don't know how real music is made. It was made with Passion and Soul and Mojo. Music suppose to make you feel good, feel happy and not some mindless cunts and nobs.

Speaking about younger, mindless fucks,when the hell did this whatdafuck called Emo came about??? What the fuck is that all about anyway? What kind of movement is that?? Suppressed Neo-Fascist Party? (a totalitarian, nationalist and corporatist ideology.) Does EMO Stand for Extreme Mental Oblivion??? Well, here is a big question, you lame-EMO- asses out there. Does it make you happier looking like this?Damn it!!! The person inside me is asking me to stab this kid exactly 73 times, no more, no less.(Oh man, your mom and dad will be really proud of you now! Well, at least you own a really successful IT company and you don't need to worry about money and a home and..... What was that? You don't? Well it sucks to be you DUMBASS!!!!) It's a big FUCK NO right??? How could you call this kind of rubbish a lifestyle, you sick fucks??!!! And don't give me that "Ooh, I hate the world cause it hates me" bullshit!!! The only reason why the world hates you is cause you refuse it, reject it, paint your face to look like a fucking whore with running mascara and slash your wrist to get the attention or something you rejected!!! What?? you were raped\molested by your uncle\stranger when you were younger? SO FUCKING WHAT!!!??? Move on motherfuckers!! A lot of people is or in the process of doing just that, so what makes you Special?? Unless you have any evidence to suggest that you're not human, I'll say it now for your benefit cause someone has to do it........ YOU ARE IN FUCKING DENIAL, YOU FUCKING STUPID FUCK!!!! You fucks give up too bloody easily!!! You know what, go fucking kill yourself!! We need less of your type draining and polluting this world. Hey, the world sucks, yes it does!! But I got a life!!

You're embarrassing yourself and the people around you!!!

To be fair, there are some (read: SOME) emo's out there who looks presentable, live reasonably and have a friendly characteristic. These people have found out that they can be whatever they want to be without trying to feel sorry for themselves. They have their own skeletons hidden in closets too, but they end up being better than some fucks who never had a days worth of difficulty in their lives.(I'll save that for another time).

Note: Some people says that Emos are no different that punks and goths. Now remember this, Punks are angry people who just don't give a fuck about you and what you think(most punks that is) , shocking hair styles, some leather and chain, torn or 'slashed' jeans and tops, large boots, into vandalism's, alcohol, loud i-don't-give-a-shit music, piercings and angry sex; Goths is more like nocturnal people who may or may not be into cosplay and doesn't care what you think about them. They are in it mostly, I think, to shock the community as much as possible. Disregard what you hear about them dressing in black all the time. Goths adore colors, like white, red, purple, pink and to some extent, electric green. Black is only the basis to go with the other colors. And materials extend to PVC, leather, silk, satin, mink, anything costly. Shoes range from Italian handmade leather to PVC boots or shiny, glossy stiletto. The men dress almost metrosexually, very clean and neat and the women................... No words can be good enough to describe the mind-blowing Ooh La La's that they are. They act\live\exist like vampyr, with or without the blood, and enjoy seducing each other or everyone, into dance, trance, tribal jungle, and something that sounds like Paula Cole's Feelin' Love. Oh yeah, and sex. Lots of it. Some of them says 'no that not true', but that just means they aren't getting any..
EMOs on the other hand, they paint their face like goths, dress in black almost all the time.(jeans is in standard blue(unfaded\unsanded, with the exception of sweatpants) hoodys, sneakers, for men girl's(very tight fitting) jeans, for girls something loose or skirts. (Asian Emo girls seems to prefer skirts to jeans) Painted nails and sporting piercings all over the face. What? 4 isn't enough??And very chicken-shit to stand up for themselves. In short, Emos are a combination of all styles and genre into a fucked up packages. Slashed arms, chest, legs.... What the fuck!!! Its more like "Fuck you!! Leave me alone!!! I hate you!!! Fuck the world!!! Oh look, a sharp object. let me just cut and bleed myself in front of everyone cause I want to let the world see how I feel inside!!! HEY! Why the fuck the ambulance here for???!!! Get away from me, you fuck!!! I hate you!!!" How else would a normal human being respond to seeing someone bleeding from an open wound???

Listen People!!! If they want to be left alone, fine. Leave those idiots alone. When they pick up something like Gangrene or something more fatal. This is like those lessons where a lot of people will have to end up dead before anybody learns and do something to stop them. For now, let them kill themselves. We just have to finish off the ones who survived. This can ease the extreme population problem that we are facing. Less trash, more space.

Parents!!! If your kids shows early signs of EMO-CORE, i,e: I hate you mom!!! I hate you dad!!! Go fuck yourself!!!, Please do the right thing and drown them in a pool, river, quarry, whatever, etc... cause no self-respecting person would say I hate you in your face. Any self-loving person knows that we only curse very silently behind you...

And as I was saying, before I got interrupted, yeah, the Rat Pack... We miss you Frank 'King' Sinatra...

Oh, I forgot...
Don't Trust In Your Government!!!

If rain should ever stop, I'll be dying for a drop...

2008-11-10T14:59:00.002+08:00

Ello,

I haven't been keeping up to date with my blogs these few weeks? I think...
I blame it all on SPOREtm!!!
The game is excellent!!! Bodacious!!! Thanks to Cuz Adam who mention about it weeks back.
I'm bloody hooked to that shit!!

Anyways, soon, hopefully, I'll be working with Toys'R'Us in 1 Borneo.
Hey, who says that work has to be all about work huh?
I use to work with animals back in pets wonderland,KL.
whats the difference with handling kids?

Recently got a laptop.
still trying to get use to it.
I'm not really a laptop kinda guy.
but hey, beggers can't be choosers

I had a trampoline in my room, now i don't have a trampoline anymore.
family claimed it as their own.
there goes the euphoric experience of sex in a trampoline
Fuck it.

I'm gonna buy a bigger trampoline when the time comes.

life being single isn't as fun as it use to be.
FUCKITFUCKITFUCKIT!!!!
Single is happiness,Single is happiness,Single is happiness....

I need a life..
God, Please make it rain now...

A raindrop falls in the sun; As it hurls to the earth, it became undone; From His eyes it was born; It collides with the ground, Thus it was gone...

2008-10-14T20:15:00.005+08:00

"The Seeker Of Delight"

She sit and stare, into the blue,
And feel that all is wrong;
She wants to run to Paradise,
But she has lost it's sight.

She pulls herself out of the chair,
She brush her hair from her eyes,
She feels just dizzy from all the high,
Her eyes hurt cause its too bright.

She seems to see into her dream,
Her footsteps are all scattered,
Her Anger boils, unconditional,
Her Rage she could not hide.

She part her lips to speak,
But she really wants to scream,
Her voice sounded like a croak,
Cause she has lost her might.

And so she crashes to the earth,
So tired of all the hate,
She tries to think of many things,
But she know that things aren't right.

As she reach out across the room,
She search inside her bag,
She found what she's looking for,
This seeker of delight.

She popped a couple into her mouth,
And smiled a sinister grin,
She laid her head upon the bed,
And pass out for the night......

When darkness looms and raindrops fall; The stalker preys, not one, but all...

2008-10-07T18:33:00.005+08:00

Love is the sweetest joy you can ever have, and the most bitter sorry you could ever feel.
To Love is to feel your heart leaping off your chest...

To Love is

To possess.
To have.
To keep.
To need.
To be addicted to.
To worry.
To laugh with.
To cry for.
To hope for.
To demand from.
To obsess about.
To serve.
To kneel for.
To stand up for.
To hold on to.
To let go of.
To live for.
To die for.
To miss.
To remember by.
To forget the past.
To guide.
To turn away.
To be bold for.
To fear for.
To be spoken for.
To be speechless.
To be honest.
To lie.
To never give up.
To surrender to.
To be intelligent.
To be a fool for.
To be careful.
To be careless.
To be trustworthy.
To be suspicious.
To be here.
To be there.
To be first.
To be last.
To put up high.
To be down low.
To be crazy.
To be sane.
To show.
To hide.
To be confused.
To understand.

To Love is everything and nothing.
To Love is creating miracles along the way.

All I need is a little drop of rain, If it starts I would surely go insane...

2008-10-07T15:48:00.007+08:00

Love.
A limitless frustration?
An infinite desire?
A countdown to destruction?

What is Love? How do one define Love? Does Love mean everything? Can nothing mean Love? Is there a limit to Love? Or is Love an unfathomable emotion? Is Love even measurable? Must we say "I Love you" to feel Loved? Isn't to Love itself suffice? Is Love equal between Man and Beast? Does 'to Love someone' means to care deeply for one? Could one Love without care? Is Love really free? Can Love be given without expectations? Is Love really eternal? Can one Love, while they hate? Can one hate, while they truly Love? Can Love be truly true? Can passion exist without Love? Can one learn how to Love? Can one really lose their Love? Does Love lead to pleasure? Or does pleasure overshadows Love? Is Love an illusion of grandeur? Is Love a passing phase? Can Love really wait? Does Love give time?

Love.

What is Love? How do we define Love?

Can existence be without Love?

I surely can't...

What the hell?? Its snowing in Sab... Oh.. ashes.... I Want Rain!!!

2008-10-07T00:34:00.001+08:00

I HATE MOSQUITOES!!!

What the hell are they good for anyways??!!! All they do is suck your soul away!! ngahhhhhhhh!!!!!

I HATE SAND FLIES!!!

What is the whole point of going to the beach if all you get in the end is little boil-like spots all over your body? A person with serious acne problem don't even itch this bad!!! I want to pour acid on myself!!!! Wait!!! Tuhau and chilli padi might just work!!! If it works, I'll be rich!!!! Muahhahahahahahhahaha!!!!!!

I HATE MOTORBIKES!!!!!

No, not Harley bikes. I LOVE Harley's!!! Its just those crazy 'mosquito' motorbikes, like super kamikaze assassin riding a homing missiles on two wheels. When one is coming right at you, you know its too late... Just pray the guy survives so he could pay for the damage to your car..

I HATE SLEEPING!!!

Cause I hate waking up in the morning!!! The sun is sure not friendly to vampires. I feel sad for all the people out there who has to wake up and face the day without actually wanting to.

I LOVE BLOGGING!!! BUT I HATE THINKING WHAT TO BLOG ABOUT!!!!

bla bla bla bla bla bla... You know the bla banana pudding bla bla bla... Sometimes if you bla bla bla Darth Vader! bla bla yadda nail varnish yadda yadda so on and so forth...

I LOVE TURTLES!!!

But I hate turtle neck sweaters!!!
One: I cant fit into one without looking horizontally challenged.
Two: I'll look as if I have no neck!!!
Three: I don't have one to really confirm those allegations!!!

Whatever.....

Hey!! Where those animals gone to??

2008-10-06T23:33:00.000+08:00

I think there is a government conspiracy going on. Subtle things have happened and no one seem to notice...

GOODNESS SAKE PEOPLE!!! MCA HAD A MEETING IN THE TRADE CENTER LAST WEEK!!!

I also heard that the Najib dude was here too.

something smells fishy and it ain't my kitchen...

Speaking about fish, I had a pet fish once. I miss you Jello... Life can never be the same anymore... I miss my iguanas too, Tom, Dick and Pedro. I also miss my dog, Get-The-Hell-Off-ME..

I the papers today, "efforts to trace 'mystery voter' fail". How the hell you gonna find some people who doesn't exist? The 'effort' they put into it is also a mystery.. Who is assigned to find these people? That is a mystery as well. Bloody conspiracy...

I dislike politics. I also dislike politicians. I would like to use harsher words but I'm trying to prevent getting rape in prison. I don't need a new butt hole, thank you very much. Politicians, they'll tell you what you'd like to hear, promising a brighter future and la la la... Seriously, some places in KK still lack streetlights and you're telling me "a brighter future"?

THEY LIED!!!!!

Of the many politicians, not one has honestly done what they promise to do. I don't really bother about it anymore and I just want to rant about and get it out of my chest. I want to buy my own country and have a simple government, where weed is legal and free and everyone is a hippy!!! Wait... oh yeah... Amsterdam. Right...

I can't stand political bullshit. Even I don't sit around, playing with buffalo droppings. Why can't we have a government more like Singapore? They seem to be doing very well, I mean damn it!!!(sorry for the french, German, Cantonese, whatever..) The city is clean!!! I can't even smoke without the fear I may offend someone!! Wait, maybe that one suck. Still, its a great country!! Sabah rule too, but for some reason or other, we can't seem to survive without foreign labour (read: pilaks). Sarawak seem to do better. I mean come on!!! the Chinese in China uses their own people to construct the bird nest this-is confusion thingy!!! All we get is stupid lousy housing with cracking walls!!! They have pork everywhere!! All we have is restriction!!! "strictly no pork" my ass!!!

Anyways, why do we call keys 'keys'? I bet you the first person to think it up was this guy who locked himself out of his house and with a smug look on his face, he must have said "Not again!! Ooookey..... Here we go again". Thus the birth of the word "key".

It Rained!!! HEY!!! Who's cats and dogs are these???!!!!

2008-10-06T22:55:00.000+08:00

As i sit here watching the cats and dogs melt down and drain away, I realised that I don't know what to blog about. Everyone I know keep saying "anything you blog about is fine. It's what you feel" or something like that.

I feel fat...

To blog or not to blog? What? About me feeling fat? Are you kidding??? Who wants to here about how difficult it is to swing my lard around where ever i go? I know, I know. Stop saying you're fat. Well, whop-dee-do!!! I owe someone lots of 50 cents.

OK!!!Time to be serious!

------- SERIOUS CONTENT BELOW-------

I ran out of mopiko cream. S*%T!!! I hate sand flies!!! My feet look like I walked through a chicken pox factory barefooted. I've got red spots on my red spots!!!

I don't want to drink anymore...
ya like that's ever gonna happen...
I bet I could bottle my blood and sell it with labels bearing a 60% alcohol line.

For the past, I think, two months I'm guessing (i have a goldfish for an uncle. long story), I have found new friends and reconnected with people that don't look the same from the high school yearbooks anymore. I have to say it's been great! I've met really interesting people that I really enjoy hanging out with and for this moment in my life, I don't feel so alone anymore(You have no idea...) There is the normal but fun ones, the really out of their mind ones(like me!!!) and really **(#^&$!*^*)&()!#@$ ones too(names have been removed to protect myself).

How I love having great neurotic friends..

The best of all, they trust me enough to confide in me and I thank them for accepting me the way I am. You know who you are so I shall not name anyone.
Really, after my last blog(read it, why don't ya!), I have found my real friends amongst this sea of horrible characters in my life.

OK, enough being all soft.

I need a Fu#*%ng job!!! I have reached the edge of taking-it-too-easy. i have used up all my best alibis to avoid being one of those robotic, hard-working people. Don't get me wrong, I do get jealous seeing people having jobs and in the same time having fun. I HATE WORK!!! but i need a life too... So into the matrix must i immerse myself.

On a final note, who in the world came up with the word 'Frisbee'? How did the name come about? Was he playing with one and accidentally hit a bee and upon close inspection, the bee's hair was all frizzled? Is there such a word as frizzled? And he end up saying, "hey guys, look. Its a Frizzed Bee."? I bet all his friends was like "What the hell is Barry trying to say?". Does 'the Amazing Flying Upside Down Plastic Saucer' sound that horrible? Next time I see some people playing one I'll go "Hey look, they're playing a afudps".

Oh Lord... How I Wish For Rain...

2008-10-01T01:34:00.000+08:00

Funny how the good things in life turns out to be a dud, especially when it your friends turn out to be ‘duds’. Friends that you used to hang out with turns out to be not much of a friend at all. I do admit that in my problem, I’m partial to the cause. Guess I am my own demise. Whatever happened to ‘Leave no man behind?’ I’m left out so many times that i began to just flush my feelings down the bowl. ~~‘Friends~~ ~~Forever’~~ is so much of a bullshit that I learned that keeping to one’s self is the best option. No degradations, no misunderstandings, no lectures nor abashment. So what if I don’t make as much as them. At least I got a real job. I don’t like working for others cause their expectations are dreadful. I mean, you give out an arm and a leg, literally, and they go for your head too. I am my own boss. Screw all them people who call themselves managers or bosses but yet can’t get their hands wet. I realize that I’m not financially able to be social with people, but I never expect them to be in the first place. my idea of fun is just getting together with the least amount of money. Talking doesn’t cost a thing, just time. I see people going to clubs and chic cafes and I think, is it all worth it?

"I work so I could make money to have fun lor…"

Oh yes, heard that one already. Go ahead and spend everything. What you eat or drink will eventually go out of your system anyway, so go ahead and purchase those expensive sushi’s or that designer-priced coffee. Money spent for your fun’s can feed a family of 12 for 4and a half weeks. Where’s the fun now? Go check ‘covetousness’ in the net, and tell me, some of you, that’s not your middle name.

Me? I take my girlfriend out for a nice dinner once a month, a new handbag or a pair of shoes, movies… well, that’s all i could afford (for now..). At least I try. Money is not a priority anyway. But guess I’m the only eccentric amongst the crowd here. I detest money-minded-robotic morons. Really, the only reason relationship don’t work these days is cause of money. Too much, you’re fucked. Not enough, you’re fucked. The rich don’t understand what love really means cause they can afford to buy love at their leisure, like it or not, thats the awful truth. The poor can’t even afford to keep a girl happy, unless she herself don’t mind moping in dirt. LOVE ENDS WHERE MONEY BEGINS!!!

Real love is something that remains loyal in good times and bad, especially the bad. I know a number of people who can’t live without spending $200 a day. And they have the nerve to say that I can’t control my finances. Well guess what dweebs, I don’t have a rich daddy or mummy like you un-independent babies. Can’t do anything without mum’s and dad’s checking account. I bet you all gots a joint credit account with your parents. HAH!!! I may not be rich now, but I still got a heart.

And so shall I say,

"Screw all ye who abandon ye friendship. There nay any worth in pursuit of unity if all me gets is a dirk in me back. Me loyalty ne’er come cheap, but’ll yer pays is trust. I’ll gut meself b’fore me ends up wif ta likes of ye scum-buckets! Yer ain’t gittin ‘ny luv frm me!"

Behold! The Sun! Oh wait... nevermind...

2008-10-01T01:32:00.000+08:00

A week ago i read that some muslim ‘political party’ will pay out the sum of RM 10,000 to any muslim religious teacher who is willing to marry women from the rural areas of Malaysia.

Now I say what the hell is going on here?!
For your information, I’m not racist, but this is too much! I mean what are they thinking? What kind of religious political party would resort to this?

Sounds a lot like vice to me…

I don’t mind going to prison cause at lease someone, somewhere IS reading this.

Recently, lots of dumb idiots were trying(take note, ‘were‘. they’re all dead now) to steal them copper cables from those huge power transformers. needless to say, them guys were brave enough to try it when the power was still on. They will surely be missed for their ‘electrictfying personalities’. Dumb asses…

anyways, got a question here so anyone out there with an interesting idea, please post a reply.

How would you modify a snail(genetically or otherwise) so that it could move faster? how fast is entirely up to you.

till next time earthlings…

Rain, Rain Go Away...

2008-10-01T01:30:00.000+08:00

Watching all the rain falling makes me miss the sun even more. will the sun ever shine again? ‘Soon’, i keep telling myself.

This day sucks…

the other day my brother had dilema, was in love with the right girl at the wrong time. things like that really sucks. now, two other ladies, apperently the friends of the above mention girl, are suddenly very interested in him. it might sound weird, but it confuses him. i have to admit, so am i.

i don’t understand how girls can fall for guys that they have never even met or spoken to before. i do understand the power of attraction, but hell, this is weird.

My little ‘war of words’ with my girlfriend has ended with no casualties on either side, which is great. a peace treaty has been signed and celebrations of love and unity is flourishing all around. "we are please to announce that an agreement been reached and a ceast fire has been ordered. this is a great day in which men and women can come together with love and peace"

Boy, I love making up…

in other thoughts, why some men doesn’t seem to agree when they are call ‘cute’ or ‘good-looking’ or ‘handsome’? i for one don’t think that i am. still, that doesn’t stop my girlfriend from saying so. even my brother don’t think that he is. i don’t think i need to tell you what my family think about me cause, amidst the laughter, they can’t ‘really’ lie to me (ass…). how disturbing it this to us? my brother has reached to the point where he thinks that "human emotions sucks!"

a part of him thinks he’s an alien…

NO! he doesn’t probe! matter of fact, he’s straignt.

i know there are guys out there that are ‘full of themselves’. Man, they suck. no offence to all you ladies and ‘ladies’ out there, but to all you ‘full of yourself’ guys you there, why don’t you pun on your panties and hoses and strut your stuff? remember, you might be ‘cool’ or ‘to die for’ now, butsomeday you’ll be just like everyone else. old and wrinkled and impotent. no amount of viagra can help you. us guys who realise that our looks ain’t nothing much to look at, don’t need to feel so bad.

behind every face, its all just skin and bones(and sometimes fat cells). it ain’t gonna last. look at them stonehenge so-called ‘early sapiens’. we only gots them bits of facial bones left. too bad.

by the way, i hope someone tout there reads this and gives me an answer. i just have the need to know and i’m getting anoyed ont knowing.

If Oxygen is O2, and water is H2O, and understanding that, though water is not in a solid form, it does have some form of weight. therefore, if water has weight, does them clouds up there drift downwards to earth? why does it stay up there? what is keeping it up there? if cloude are basically water vapour and mist, what makes it float? argh!!!!!!

i swear one day i’m going to die for knowing or even wanting to know too much.

Rain In Spain Stays Mainly Insane...

2008-10-01T01:29:00.001+08:00

It has happened. The war has started. Why do i always get myself into this mess? I just don’t get it. Is there someone who can at least tell me WHAT WOMEN WANT?

Sometimes I think they’re out for blood…

I have given my blood out already. Sacrifice of that someone you Love is what I think men should do. I’m doing it all the time, so why can’t she give me a break?

To all you ladies out there, I’m not here to insult you. I’m just letting my feelings flow out. I do not like to keep things in my mind. Perhaps that is why I am a dumb idiot, not knowing when to shut up.

On the lighter side, I’ve decided to fly to Australia. Going to be doing the ‘work and travel’ thing. So this is to all you Australians out there-

Don’t worry mate, just there to do some traveling and learning about your glorious country. Just little old me looking out from my tiny box we call Borneo Island.’

Also, I would like to take this opportunity to request for some assistance that might be needed when I’m over there. just someone I could call or meet up perhaps that could help me find a place to stay, maybe even a pub perhaps? I’m planing to see the whole of Australia in the duration of one year. I have a cousin there (Nathaniel Kitingan) that I haven’t seen in years, would be glad to meet up with him again, work in an apple orchard, maybe even learn how to play the didgeridoo.

Hey, even boys just wanna have fun. (honestly, the boys always have fun, sometimes neglecting other responsibilities)

Till next time…

Rainy Days Of June...

2008-10-01T01:20:00.000+08:00

I didn’t felt like myself today. Didn’t have the mood to work or anything, and the rain has been pouring down like its the wrath of God or something. Its been raining for days now.

Gloomy…

Don’t get me wrong, I love rainy days. Just wasn’t in the mood for it now.

Why?

The other day, my girlfriend got upset with me just cause I was joking around with her. Now she’s saying she don’t like me joking around. And all this time I thought laughter builds bonds and create a sense of security and bla, bla, etc…

Guess I was wrong…

The ladies are so hard to please these days…

What went wrong?

???

Good question…

Now I’m going all serious with her, thinking that’s what she wants me to be doing, and out of the blue she asked me "Whats wrong with you baby?". And like any typical guy I went "Huh?".

What was I to say? I don’t like to argue, and its obvious that if I open my stupid mouth, the possibility of war is unavoidable.

Yes, I do agree that women are smarter and better than men, but they sure whine a lot. Hey we men are useful too. We make you smile with our witty stupidity, which I have to say, is sadly true.

Now I have to figure out how to fix this situation and make everyone happy in the same time. If only I could squeeze a little more brain cells out so I could think how.